The wrong kind of high-low mix





The papers are up in arms about a recent Indian Vogue fashion shoot. Said shoot depicts ultra luxury accessories including a Birkin bag, a Burberry umbrella and a Fendi bib on everyday (read: poor) people. I get the point of the people complaining but really, what’s new? From Vogue and umpteen other magazines jetting to ‘exotic’ developing countries to shoot their fashion stories, to John Galliano famously being inspired by the Parisian homeless for his boho-meets-hobo couture collection, to those now-cliched trailer park fashion shoots, magazines have been doing these ‘let’s shoot high fashion on poor people to create an edgy contrast!’ editorials for aeons. I doubt the subjects of the Vogue shoot feel the same affront as the critics – unless they were forced in front of the camera – although of course I could be wrong. I think we’d all agree however, that the Fendi bib is tacky – whether on a poor child or a rich one.

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The craziest thing



The September issue of US Elle has a mini-interview with Anne Slowey and Joe Zee to introduce the Elle fash-mag reality show, Stylista to the world. One of the questions is ‘what’s the craziest thing you ever had to do as an assistant?’ Which got me thinking about my own experiences. In the early days of computers (the early ’90s to be precise), my fashion director was still welded to her typewriter, so would type out her copy then edit it by physically cutting, rearranging and Sellotaping the paragraphs – liberally peppered with crossings-out, Tipp-Ex splodges and corrections – before handing it to me to decipher and retype on the computer. I also had to answer readers’ queries like ‘where can I buy one-legged tights?’ and ‘I’m 5’0″ and size twenty, who makes fashionable clothes for my size at an affordable price?’ (Answer: no-one.) In those days, all readers’ letters were answered individually and I actually really enjoyed researching (this was pre-internet) and writing them. From doing that I learnt everything I know about dressing for non-standard bodyshapes, holiday packing to any destination and my specialities, Mother of The Bride Dressing and How Not To Look Like Mutton Dressed As Lamb.

The craziest thing I nearly had to do was dress up a ‘chicken crossing the road’ for a shoot snapped on location around London. My bonkers genius fashion director wanted it to be a quirky shoot all about one girl going about her business and the funny things happening to her during the course of her day. So a chicken costume was hired and I had a lucky escape as our wacky hairstylist volunteered at the eleventh hour to dress up as the comedy chicken. Oh the fun we had.

If I asked my old assistant what the craziest thing she had to do was while working for me, I can guess what she’d say: ‘everything, from remembering your hospital appointments to splitting up fights between you and our editor. Not to mention the time we shared a hotel room in Miami and I had to sleep on the fold-out camp bed in the living room, complete with peeping Tom at the window.’ Ah yes, well let’s not get into that, it’s all part of the learning experience isn’t it?

So…what’s the craziest thing you’ve had to do in your journey up the career ladder?

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Doing things differently



One of my regular bus routes has been on diversion for a few weeks causing great inconvenience at times, yet a welcome distraction at others. The diversion is due to a huge building site at ‘Scotch House Corner’, the corner of Knightsbridge where Burberry now stands, but which used to be a charming store called The Scotch House where you could buy all manner of Shetland, cashmere and tartanwear – how very this season! The irksome building work is down to the Candy Brothers, two infamous property developers who have razed that particular junction of Knightsbridge to the ground in order to erect their extravagant brand of luxe appartments, all at the inconvenience of we mere civilians (and no small number of tourists) trying to access Harvey Nichols, Sloane Street and the Royal Albert Hall.

Yet on the other hand – with a bit of forward planning – it’s quite nice going about business via a different route. My journey from Sloane Square to home takes me on a detour via Brompton Road where I can ogle the Skandium window displays and remind myself for the nth time that I really must pay the V&A shop museum a visit soon. I am also treated to the day-by-day development of the London Fashion Week tents in the grounds of the breathtaking Natural History Museum – is it me or do they seem to build the tents earlier every year?

Taking a different route to my appointments reminds me how easy it is to get stuck in old routines and it really is true that doing things differently makes you see life from another perspective. So much of our daily grind is governed for us, maybe we should pay more attention to what we do and why and take an active role in occassionally going against the grain. Who knows what you might discover?

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Bubbling under…Cocktail coats




Ok, I made this up simply because I like the way it sounds but a cocktail coat if it existed, would be a dramatic evening coat to wear over your cocktail dress. Because I don’t know about you but it really bugs me when people get all zhuzhed up for a night out, putting hours of thought into their spectacular outfit, shoes and make-up and then, uh oh, out comes the old bog standard jacket. I mean, why? Surely it makes more sense to invest in a show-stopping cocktail coat that will turn heads the minute you make your entrance than yet another pair of patent party plat-heels and tacky clutch?

My own cocktail coat is a black fifties-style brocade one with bracelet sleeves from Portobello Arcade a good twelve years ago. It was sold to me by a young designer friend for £60 with the words ‘I only made two and someone from Chritian Lacroix has the other one.’ (A bit like my favourite quote from Deserately Seeking Susan where Madonna buys the green jacket with the pyramid which according to the salesman ‘used to belong to Jimi Hendrix’ – probably not true but sounds good all the same.) Cocktail coats are plentiful at Burberry, Bill Blass and Lacroix (!) but thin on the ground on the high street, however come October I’m sure they’ll be everywhere so start thinking about yours now.

UPDATE: Pfft, the new Elle has a whole two-pager on cocktail coats and I was so sure I’d made that up!

Pic: 3.1 Phillip Lim coat, Style.com

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